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"Death of the New Rabbit"
posted January 23, 2006 @3:01p
My car broke down today. Again. For the second time in a week.

Last Tuesday, I had just left a restaurant (having finished a delicious steak burrito with extra sour cream) when my car stopped. I was driving down the road, and the engine just... stopped. Right there in the road. In the rain. In the middle of winter. And I was wearing sandals.

There was no emergency pull-off lane, and I had just gone over a blind hill. And there was another hill ahead of me, so my car had parked itself at the bottom of a valley.

After very unsuccessfully trying to push my car either direction, I just got back in it, buckled up and prepared to get rear-ended. But after about six really angry drivers almost smashed into the back of me, I realized maybe I shouldn't actually BE IN the car when it got hit. So I decided that I'd watch it all unfold from inside a nearby house under construction. Under-construction houses are usually empty and unlocked, and I figured it might be a little warmer in there.

When I got to the house, though, there was a team of people working on it. So I just asked them for some assistance in getting the car out of the way of traffic.

They didn't speak English.

Using my universal pointing skills to point out my car, along with the "walk in place" method to signify how I got to the house, they understood I needed some help moving my vehicle. So we started our walk down the street.

Apparently people from other countries think it's hilarious when your car breaks down, because one of them just laughed and laughed and laughed, all the way there. He'd laugh even more whenever I looked in his direction or made eye contact with him.

We had some great times on that walk, me and those Mexicans.

Once my new crew and I got to my car, we started pushing. I heard lots of Spanish being yelled, but I only understood one word: "donde." I thought, "hey I remember that one, it means WHERE."

Where are we pushing the car? Hmmm... let me think... I answered slowly, in my best Spanish accent, "THAAAAT WAAAY."

After some more pointing, yelling and almost getting hit once, we finally get the car moved out of harm's way.

Five hours later, I made it home.

Today, it happened again. In the rain. In the middle of winter. And I was wearing sandals.

If anybody wants a VW Golf, I left it on the side of the road with the key in the ignition.


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